As a new year begins, I thought it would be a good idea to examine how you currently live and how you can make it even better. To do that I’m going to talk about how simplicity and abundance can be used to create a life you love.
This article is the fourth part in a four-part series on simplicity and abundance for your:
Space : the physical world you live in
Mind : your mental experience
Body : your physical health
Soul: your inner experience.
My intention for you is to be able to identify goals for yourself after reading these four parts and be able to begin integrating your insights to create a whole picture of who you are and what you want.
DEFINITIONS
I want to start with some quick definitions to make sure we’re all on the same page.
Soul: This refers to your emotional heart. It’s the place that feels your passions and joys. It’s that intangible part of you that needs to be fed to keep you going.
Simplicity: Reducing the negative input and messages that stop you from attending to your soul.
Abundance: Increasing your awareness of your own needs and increasing your willingness to ask for and attain those needs.
WHY YOU HAVE TO ATTEND TO YOUR SOUL
When clients come into life coaching or therapy, they often want a quick fix.
“How long will this take?” I’m asked this all the time. The answer? As long as you need.
They want to be happy, at peace, calm, and in control. Great, we can do that! So we work on cognitions (thoughts), eating and exercise habits, figuring out where their pain came from and letting go of it, while taking better care of themselves.
Then they ask me why they still aren’t happy. “What do you have in your life that belongs only to you? Not your husband, your kids, your parents, your job or your friends?”
Too often the answer is, “Nothing.”
From there we work on identifying what makes this person happy, and how to bring more of it into their life.
You see, you can work for years on your behaviors, habits, and thought patterns. You can read every book, article, and meme. You can watch every YouTube video, Tic Toc, or Reel. You can go to yoga classes, meditations, get reiki, cover yourself in crystals, sage, and essential oils. In fact, please do any of these things that speaks to you.
However, if you don’t absorb the information and apply it to yourself to discover who you are deep down and what you want, you’ll always be searching.
That place deep down that tells you what you want is your soul. Your center, your heart.
Your soul is personal. You can’t find out what it needs by asking your best friend what hers needs. You can’t decide it’s what the heroine of your favorite novel needed. We are all different and all need different things to fill us up.
SIMPLICITY FOR YOUR SOUL
Simplicity creates the space for your soul to speak.
Simplicity is quieting yourself. It’s the thing that is buried under all of the hurt, anger, judgements, and fears.
When you slow yourself down, and slowly peel those things away, you find the core of you. This is your intuition, your gut, your instinct. This is that thing you ignore because what it has to say doesn’t fit with what you’ve been told your life is supposed to be like, or what you thought you were supposed to do.
Fear will try to stop you from unburying your soul.
You will be afraid you won’t like what you find. Yes, sometimes we do have to face truths about ourselves that we aren’t proud of or dislike, but that’s simply one more layer to remove to get to your heart.
To peel back those layers, you will have to be willing to set aside the messages you learned as a child that told you that you weren’t good enough. You will have to be willing to set aside the messages from your peers that tell you that you have to be more to be worthwhile. You have to be willing to believe that you are lovable and deserving.
How do you get to this place? If I had one answer that I could give all of you, I’d be very, very rich right now. It would mean I had broken the code that philosophers have been working on for millennia.
What I can tell you is that if you let yourself go gently into your life, slow yourself down, and let go of the pain that no longer serves you, there will be a moment in which you will see it all clearly. It will be like a light switch got flipped. You will know that you do have the answers you’re looking for, and that they will be waiting when you’re ready for them.
ABUNDANCE FOR THE SOUL
There is active work to be done on your journey for your soul. That’s what abundance is.
The work will look a little different for everyone, but the basic components will be there.
Increased self-awareness
Increased willingness to face fear
Increased acceptance of yourself and others
Self-Awareness
No personal work gets done without self-awareness. If you aren’t aware, how can you know what to do? I’ve seen those who resist awareness and I’ve watched them struggle with being stuck. I’ve watched them ignore their soul and give into the messages they have been given by others.
There are ways to increase your awareness like:
Talk to your coach or therapist
Meditate
Make up your own mind
Trust yourself
Facing Fear
Fear is an important yet overused emotion. It stops us from considering alternatives. It stops us from trying something new. It stops us from discovering our hearts. What are you afraid of? Please don’t say “Nothing” as I’ve heard that over and over and it’s never true. Your self-awareness ought to be able to help you answer the question.
To face fear, you will may need to experiment with deviating from your norm.
Turn left when you usually turn right. Try a food you said you hated, yet had never tasted. Ask questions if you’re usually quiet. Be silent and observe if you’re usually the center of attention.
Take the risk to be yourself. That’s what your soul is craving.
Acceptance
Finally, acceptance of what is brings truth forward, making it impossible for your soul to be ignored. Acceptance of yourself, acceptance of the people around you, acceptance of the world. If you keep thinking you or anything else should be other than what you or it are…you will stay stuck.
Accept what you like, even if other people think you’re nuts. Accept what you want, even if others tell you you’re wrong. Accept who you are even if it’s different from what you thought.
Your self-awareness opens up your ability to see the truth. Facing fear shows you your true limits, not the ones you assumed you had. Acceptance allows you to see everything for what it is.
TAKE YOUR TIME
Pushing to discover what your soul want will make it slip away. Instead of pushing, sit back and observe yourself and your life. You may find your answers in unusual places that never occurred to you.
Quiet your mind. Open up the space for your self-awareness, facing of fears, and acceptance.
It is often beneficial to have someone to hold a safe place for you while you explore. A Life Coach like myself is one such person.
I know you have all of your answers under those layers of pain. I’ll walk beside you as you find them.